The best keyboard for these 5 everyday activities may surprise you: Qwerty vs Dvorak vs Colemak

Satire Satire - Tech Satire - Video

There are different keyboard layouts, and some such as Dvorak and Colemak have been tested to be more efficient than typing in the Qwerty keyboard layout. But which one is really the best? I put each keyboard to the test in a variety of challenges. Here is which keyboard won in each tested category:

Declaring Own Island Micronation: Colemak

When I declared a micronation in the pacific ocean, the Colemak keyboard came out on top in terms of how effective it was at said declaration and defense of sovereignty.

Summoning Satan: Qwerty

Summoning Satan can be a daunting task. In my test, the Qwerty keyboard surprisingly was the best. This could be because Satan is used to the legacy ways of being summoned, and the Qwerty layout gave them enough time to rise from the depths of hell.

Making Waffles: Colemak

When I made waffles, the Colemak layout made waffles the quickest and the tastiest. One point for Colemak.

Scrolling Through Infinite News Feed: Dvorak

When I pressed the down arrow key to scroll through an infinite news feed for 1 year, with my finger taped to a wireless keyboard, the Dvorak keyboard did the best job.

Petting a Kitten: Colemak

The same kitten was pet with all 3 keyboards, and purrferred the Colemak keyboard.

Overall Winner: Colemak

Overall, the Colemak keyboard proved to be the most effective at helping me with my daily tasks.

What do you think? Which keyboard layout is best for you? What do you use your keyboard for? Comment below to let us know.

Update: The amazing people at the Colemak forum have updated the Colemak keyboard layout’s ability to summon demons and cause chaos for all lands and all people, with the only normalcy being the destruction of the sanity people thought they had lost and each day logarithmically becoming more insane as all is consumed by carnage. A new keyboard test is available at

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4 years ago

Waffles seem so good right now.